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Parenting Styles

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The family institution has the most important role for the formation of a personality and also has a significant effect on the further growth and self-realization of a person. As is known, parenting is a common name for the processes of influence on children by parents and other family members with the view to achieving the desired results. The role of the family education is extremely important, as well. Therefore, the style of parenting that is chosen by parents has a great effect on the future growth and development of a child. Its influence is decisive not only on the formation of a successful individual but also on the progress of the entire society.

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A parenting style is the way the parents treat their children and the application of certain methods of influence on offspring, which are expressed in a peculiar manner of the verbal communication and interaction with a child. Any disharmony in the family leads to unfavorable consequences in the development of the young personality and causes problems in its behavior. In psychology, there are four basic parenting styles: authoritarian, authoritative, permissive and uninvolved (neglectful) ones. Also, such two styles as chaotic and hyper-worried deserve attention and consideration. Each parenting style has pros and cons, but authoritative parenting is the best one; because of mutual respect, trust, and close communication between parents and children, it helps one develop harmoniously and prepare to the future life.

Authoritarian Parenting

In the authoritarian style of upbringing, parents suppress the initiative of a child, as well as rigidly direct and control his behavior and actions. In their practice, they use physical punishment for the slightest misconduct and resort to coercion and prohibitions. In these families, children are deprived of parental love, caring, and sympathy. Such parents strive to make a child obedient and executive. As a result, youngsters grow either unassured, timid, neurotic, incapable of standing up for themselves or latently aggressive, authoritarian, and conflicting. Such children experience difficulties with assimilating in the society. Parents strictly monitor the preparation of the homework by younger schoolchildren. For the purpose of self-defense, children use a variety of tricks, for example, crying, shouting, and demonstrating their helplessness. As a result, children lose the desire to learn and can hardly concentrate during explanations of the teacher or during the preparation of lessons.

With parents, such children may seem calm and executive, but as soon as the threat of punishment disappears, their behavior becomes unmanageable. With such upbringing, children only develop a mechanism of external control based on a sense of guilt or fear of punishment, and when such threat disappears, the behavior of a young one can become antisocial. Authoritarian relations exclude sincere affinity with children, so there is rarely a feeling of attachment between them and their parents. Such situation leads to suspiciousness, constant alertness, and even hostility to others. Matejevic, Assoc, and Jovanovic (2014) note, According to D. Baumrinds theory, children who have authoritarian parents are conflicted-irritable, have a tendency to be moody, unhappy, vulnerable to stress, and unfriendly. It should be mentioned that this style of parenting also has some positive effects. Under the influence of authoritarian parents, usually, children are rather obedient and diligent. They become good performers; this ability often helps them achieve success in their work. If parents are fair, a child can learn a discipline, resoluteness, and following moral and ethical norms.

Permissive Parenting

Permissive parenting is characterized by warm relationships between parents and children. The communication with a child is based on the principle of permissiveness and low discipline. The offspring is not properly directed; thus, he or she hardly understands the limits and restrictions. In addition, such parents are characterized by the inability or unwillingness to supervise children. They enable youngsters to express themselves, demonstrate their abilities, discover creativeness and talents, and develop individuality. Parents sincerely believe that in this way, they will teach their children to distinguish between the right and wrong. They are indulgent and passive in their parenting and believe that the way to demonstrate their love is to give in to wishes of their childrens (Kopko, 2007).

Paradoxically, children from such families become unhappy in life. They are more vulnerable to such psychological problems as depression and phobia of all kinds. In addition, they are also inclined to committing violence. They are also easily involved in all sorts of antisocial actions and behavior. The lack of discipline makes them want to control their parents. Positive effects of this style of parenting are the following: a child does not experience humiliation; such individuals know that parents will accept and love them under any conditions.

Hyper-Worried Parenting

In the hyper-worried style of parenting, adults deprive their child of independence in physical, mental, and social development. They are constantly beside it striving to solve its problems; in other words, they live the life of their child while caring needlessly, protecting it, fearing, and worrying about its health and wellbeing. Even when a child becomes an adult, parents preserve such attitude. The hyper-worrying suppresses the initiative, willingness, and freedom of a child, as well as his or her energy and cognitive activity. It deprives one of independence, fosters obedience, the lack of will, helplessness, and generates dependency, inconsistency, infantilism, self-doubt, avoidance of risk, and the lack of communication skills. In a hyper-worried style of parenting, parents unconsciously inhibit the formation of child's skills and abilities and the development of perseverance in achieving the goal. Of course, this style has few advantages effects, as well. Such child is raised up in love and care; one does not know what the neglectful attitude of parents is.

Uninvolved (Neglectful) Parenting

Parents who do not establish rules and guidelines for their childs behavior would be described as possessing a neglectful parenting style (Turner, Chandler, & Heffer, 2009). Parents do not notice their child; they are not interested in its development and feelings, they are indifferent to its personality at all. As a result, they actively avoid any communication and interaction with the offspring. Children are left to themselves. Parents do not set any restrictions for the youngsters; they are indifferent to them and are closed to communication. Often, they are so immersed in own problems that they simply do not have time and energy to raise children. If parents' indifference is combined with hostility, a child may develop a tendency to antisocial behavior. An uninvolved style of parenting is observed more often in dysfunctional families, in which one or both parents abuse alcohol or drugs. There are few positive moments of this parenting style: freedom of parents at all stages of the childs development and a freedom of a child. No other positive moments in this style of upbringing were found.

Chaotic Parenting

Some psychologists distinguish the chaotic style of the family education, which is characterized by the absence of a consistent approach to the upbringing of a child. In other words, there are no specific and clear requirements. A chaotic style arises from the disagreements of parents in the choice of means and methods of education. Conflicts in the family become more frequent with time; parents constantly sort out their relationship. Unpredictable actions and reactions of the adults deprive a child of a sense of stability, provoke uncertainty, impulsiveness, anxiety, aggressiveness, uncontrollability, and social maladjustment. With such parenting, a sense of responsibility and self-control in a child are not formed, while immaturity of judgments and low self-esteem are common. Despite the named disadvantages, this style of parenting has some advantages, as well. Thanks to different methods of upbringing; a child may grow as a versatile personality.

Authoritative Parenting

The authoritative style of parenting is characterized by close relations between parents and children, moderate disciplinary demands, and supportive hopes for the future of children, as well as frequent communication (Kopko, 2007). Unlike permissive parents, these adults are firm and consistent in their demands and actions. In the authoritative style of parenting, parents encourage any initiative of a child and its independence, as well as take into consideration its needs and feelings. They demonstrate love and goodwill, talk with it about interesting topics. Parents allow children to take part in the discussion of family problems and consider their opinions. In turn, they require a meaningful behavior from children; they show firmness and consistency in observing discipline.

These children are less prone to negative influence from their peers and successfully build relationships with them. Since the authoritative style of education provides a balance between control and independence, its result is a competent, responsible, independent, and self-confident child. Moreover, such children are better adapted to life. They respect the authorities; they manage to control their desires. These children are more confident and responsible, so the likelihood of abusing drugs or alcohol is much lower. They also have fewer phobias, depressions, and manifestations of aggressiveness.

Considering all parenting styles, it should be noted that each one has both advantages and disadvantages. All have their unique characteristics that influence the child's personality. The chosen parenting style depends on the parents themselves: on their nature, character, temperament, childhood, and education, for example. However, authoritative parenting seems to be the best because of close communication, warm relations, moderate disciplinary demands and a mutual respect between parents and children.

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It is worth noting that the existence of such parenting styles as authoritarian, authoritative, uninvolved (neglectful), permissive, hyper-worried, and chaotic indicates that there is still no single view on the effective parenting of a child. It is worth emphasizing that the choice of the style of parenting depends on many factors. Modern family seeks to move away from standardized parenting. In addition, the family as a social institution only strengthens its position. Consequently, the chosen style of parenting can have the basic role not only in the formation of a successful personality but also the development of the whole society. Each parenting style has pros and cons, but authoritative parenting is the best approach.

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